Personal Perestróĭka

The song I’ve most recently had on repeat: Since Sunday – Caleb Stine and the Brakemen (click to download) If nothing else this song makes me want to run away to Barcelona. But then pretty much everything makes me want to run away to Barcelona. Clearly I need a rich Catalan husband. Damn, why must my dreams always be so impractical? Granted I succeeded at running away to Nashville, so why not Barcelona too? Anyway, uh, the song, yeah, it’s pretty much just perfect for where I’m at right now. It’s sad, but in a wistful, maybe hopeful kind of way, which I’m sure you’ve figured out is my favorite thing ever in a song.

Okay, well I’m already in sort of bitchy hormonal mood today, but someone just asked, in the comm if we thought maybe Frist was going to resign from the Senate. When people responsed sarcastically, that, uh, yeah, he already did, that’s what whole Ford/Corker race was about, the original poster responded defensively as to why everyone was acting like this was something she should know, since she doesn’t watch the news but instead is only informed by NPR. Holy fucking asshattery, Batman. Anyway, I usually breeze on by such pointlessness, but I couldn’t help add my own snotty $0.02, because really WTF? Why isn’t Frist tossing his hat in the presidential ring is a relevant question. Is he resigning from the Senate is like asking is Abe Lincoln is dead, for christsfuckingsakes.

Oddly, this seems to have improved my mood, although not my love for my fellow man.

I did fix my bed today! With cardboard and duct tape, yeehaw!!! Um, what? The slats were shifting and I just sort of wedged them in so they can’t move anymore.

It’s so windy out that our porch chairs blew out into the yard. I’m consiering attaching them to the railing with bungee cords. That’s right, I am all about the redneck fixits today.

In other news, I am doing laundry. In the comfort of my own home. That’s right, bitches, we finally got that washer hooked up. It only took, what? Six weeks? For us to find someone else to do it all for us so we didn’t have to do anything. Man, we really need a house boy.

The Mole people next door have a huge fancy Xmas tree in their front window and thus have opened their curtains for the first time (well except to occasional peek out in a creepy, paranoid manner). Of course the shrubbery blocks the view from the street, but it’s nice that you could stand on the porch, four feet from the window and see the tree. Heh.

Man, don’t go asking me any questions today that you don’t want bitchy sarcastic answers to.

In less than 30 days I will see alitria, msandromeda, raveninthewind, BoyNamedSue, RobbieBunny, and possibly SnowBoy, bassgrrl, perclexed, plus my momma, sista and daddy-o and all the rest of the Seattle peeps!! I can’t wait! It better not be snowing then though. Seattle, please to be being done with your stupid weather before I get there!

Obstreperous.

Yes, that’s just about how I feel. Joyfulgirl felt as such last week and clearly she’s passed it on to me.

I’ve been up since 7:30. This isn’t such a big deal, except now I need to get ready for work and suddenly I just want to back to bed and sleep all day. Coffee isn’t even helping.

I did finally get the Cherry Blossom Designs site updated yesterday. I’m moving so slowly this year, I swear it’ll be 2007 before I even know it.

It’s snowing in Seattle. There’s a severe weather warning for ice. The Hawks had to play a game in the snow. Not only are schools closed, but the Microsoft campus and other businesses closed. This is insane. Normal, maybe, for January, but November? So weird! Weirder still it’s about 67°F here right now. I mean, I’m sure winter will come and it has frosted over a few nights, but I can’t help but feel glad to be in Nashville right now and not Seattle.

ETA: You know what’s a shitty way to die? Having a construction crane fall into your apartment.

I’m tired. Pointlessly, uselessly tired. The kind of tired where you aren’t sure why you are up, moving around zombie-like, unable to to concentrate, but really you’re just too tired to go to bed.

The holidays are coming and so the Amazon wishlist is updated, though mostly for my father’s benefit as he’s now completely lost without it for shopping. At least wishlists keep him from callimg me on the 23rd of Dec. and asking what I think my mom would want for Christmas. Although if any of you want to buy me that shiny new laptop, have at it. Since I know you’re all so made of money that you crinkle when sit down.

Cherry Blossom Designs update tomorrow with shiny new pretties just (barely) in time for Xmas.

I’m too tired to think of anything interesting to say. Maybe tomorrow will be better.

Back from Ohio. Getting there was hideous. It took twice as long as should have and not just because of grandma driving. Bad accidents. Detoured off the highway, driving back roads in Kentucky after dark. Yep.

K and were repeatedly mistaken for lesbians. In a polite, let me drop in that I know women who’ve had a commitment ceremony type of way. Oy.

I was gonna write this whole thing about how weird and creepily middle American Ohio is, but I’m lazy and tired. High points include T’giving with K’s family, pedicures in awesome massage chairs, and insane shopping/antiquing trip to a quaint little town in which I over heard the follow conversation as a couple was coming out of a store:

Husband: Did I tell you and about what happened to Hodges?
Wife: No.
H: He went out ot his cruiser and it was broken down. So he had to get another on from the station and he checked the oil in that before he went out and it was bone dry!

Apparently police forces in rural/suburban Ohio don’t have mechanics? The poor man appalled at this turn of events.

Mind you this happened in small town where they had Santa at one of the street, for pics with kids and Santa gave each kid a trick or treat type bag and then all the stores on Main St. were giving out holiday candy and toys trick or treat style. Savvy town marketing to get parents in to shop, I guess.

I alos read the local papers while I was there. God save our country if anyone is using the Cinci paper for real news. Eep.

All in all the weather was gorgeous and we had a good time. I have a fabulous new scarf from K’s aunt and am considering knitting as possible fuiture exercise. Shhhh, don’t tell anyone.

My toes look fabulous. Although the color looked good in the bottle. On my toes? It looks like something my mom would have picked.

Today’s gems:

Orgasm for peace

Dissapearing urinals

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K and I are off tomorrow for holiday family fun in Ohio. We’ll be gone the rest of the week. I’m going to make the usual, “gee, I don’t know how much I’ll be online” statement, which means I’ll probably be endlessly online. Isn’t that how it always works? (This time I’ll be wrong to prove the rule, I suppose).

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Links of a vaguely (or very) sexual nature found recently around the internet that make me giggle like a 12 year old boy:

Who designed this?

You’re allergic to my what?

That is so wrong.

Hot library smut.

Okay, that last one doesn’t make me giggle so much as it makes me totally swoon.

It’s been raining all day but right now there’s a break in the clouds that looks strangely like the only place there aren’t clouds is right over my yard. The only stars visible in this break of deep blue are the full constellation of Orion. (Yay, Betelgeuse!) It’s a very pretty night.

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We haven’t had a song around here in a while. So let’s do that. To Be Sung To – The New Tragedies (click to download). I’d put up the lyrics but I’m too lazy to transcribe them. It doesn’t matter though because you already own this album, right? If not, why not?

Dear Dell Tech Support,

Fuck you for wasting 8 hours of K’s time and solving nothing.

No love,

jj

—

Dear Me,

You are an awesome goddess for solving the problem. Dell should hire you to troubleshoot all their crap since in 8 hours they never ever suggested the fix you found.

much love,

me

—

Dear Internet,

Thanks for being available for me to search so I could fix things. Please always work for me.

love and kisses,

jj

Just when I’d given up on Brenzny for going too surrrealist, he comes through for me again:

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): “Dear Love Doctor: Please send a divine slap upside the head to the clueless guy I’m in a half-assed relationship with. He’s GOT to wake up to the fact that it’s high time to let someone, namely me, shower him with love. I mean, all the magic’s in place. With just a flick of his attitude, he could materialize me whipping up gourmet Cajun cuisine in his new kitchen–not to mention spicing up every other room in his house. Love Doctor, please cast a spell to get him in alignment with cosmic necessity. -Overripe Taurus.” Dear Overripe: I appreciate the ability you Bulls have right now to envision the best and brightest possibilities for your relationships. However, it’s crucial that you give everyone the freedom to bumble along, even if it means that for now they’ll be out of sync with the wonders you can imagine.

I’m always most amused when he’s telling me something I already know.

John Edwards might be my new political boyfriend. Who knew?

Jimmy Buffet made me cry. Seriously. I could not love him more today. We watched the 60 minutes tribute to Ed Bradley and Jimmy talking about him with his combination of quietly, dignifiedly choking up and clear awe and love he had for his friend was too much. Seriously, it was really moving.

Then K and I watched the Discovery Channel history of Rome thing which caused us to make hilarious, geeky Roman history jokes. Okay, well, at least we think we’re funny.

Now we’re watching COPS, which is joy.

Yeah, don’t really have anything interesting to say.

OMG, actual exchange on COPS:
cop: she said you slapped her?
guy: yeah, I did.
cop: for taking your bologna?

Best. Ever.

maxroswell tells me there’s still guys left in the world who buy girls flowers. Peeps, weigh in, is this true?

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I feel oddly overworked this week. I mean sure, I’m still living my complete slacker lifestyle, but having to a place at a certain time is hard. Heee! Okay, that’s not true, but work is mind-numbingly boring in that way that you just STARE for a hour when you get home because work ate your ability to think coherently.

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Having read all the Takeshi Kovacs books I have on hand I’m about to start re-reading the Weetzie Bat books. Even the thought of reading them again makes me both giddy and insanely melancholy. But since I have the tattoo, I hope the giddy wins out.

—

I had some other stuff to say, but as always, I’ve forgotten what must surely be the most important stuff.

I have my tickets back to Seattle for the holidays in my hot little hands. I’ll be there Dec 23-Jan 2 for anyone who wants to get together (though I think I’ve emailed most of you already). Now I just count down the days to Paseo sandwiches. Mmmmmmmm.

I need to go do laundry something fierce, but I’m having trouble motivating myself today. It’s 3 pm and so far I’ve managed to read things on the internet, read a bunch of my book and talk to my mom on the phone for two hours.

Here is the most recent hilarious conversation with my little sister:

Sis: Mom bought me some sweaters, and this hekka ugly khaki jumpsuit skirt thing that I told her was the ugliest thing I’ve ever seen in my entire life and so know she’s saving it for you because she’s positive you’ll like it.
Me: How bad can it be? Mom’s taste is usually pretty good.
Sis: Teh infamous dress.
Me: Oh it’s cute. It just needs stripey tights, stompy boots and a cardigan.
Sis: GAHEIUAWLPGBNAQLEROGRNJMTLF You have been gone to long. I MUST SAVE YOU.

Cheese straws.

Seriously, Northern people, get on getting you some of those.

I love Lucero. Almost as much as I love daft. Not only did she turn me on to them in the first place, but every single time she see’s them live she gives me the hillbilly hook-up. Which is the best thing ever even when I can’t hear all the songs clearly. I know I heard “What Else Would You Have Me Be?,” “Kiss the Bottle,” “It Gets the Worst at Night,” and few other not readily identify because of the whole loud amps/cell phone connection thing.

Seriously though, is there’s nothing better than one of your best friends ever calling you from the show of your favorite band? No. Let me reinterate my love for daft. She is my babygirl. Has been for, oh my, um, 17 years? See? She’s my girl!!!

Tonight I am full of love for my fellow man. And not just cause of the mashed potatoes K made me for dinner. Damn, I love that girl.

Also, go Dems!! Woo! My own state aside, and damn Connecticut, I’m so happy with the mid-term election results. Blue up that election map, my babies! We’re coming back!

I’m listening to NPR election coverage and they are calling their TN coverage guy and he’s at Beyond the Edge, which is like a sports bar near me. Weird.

The election is giving me heart palpitations. Fuck you, Connecticut. But go Ohio!!! Go Indiana! Kentucky! And Pennsylvania YES!! YES!!! Tennessee, man, I just, ugh! It’s too close for me to yet feel resigned and man I’m sort of hoping for a recount, though after the fiasco for the WA State governor a few years ago, I’m not sure I can survive that. No. 1 passed, which is dissapointing, but I’m holding out (a probably vain) hope for the Senate election.

K made me eggrolls for dinner. From scratch. Man, why is there no good Chinese food in Nashville? Also is anyone better than K? I think not. She’s my rock.

As it happens the neighbors, the Mole people, didn’t move out and get replaced by frat boys as we suspected. It’s still them they are just suddenly unbelievably loud and obnoxious for the first time 6 months. Maybe they’ve replaced by pod people. Also I hate them still.

Seattle peeps, I am coming home for the holidays, hopefully I’ll be there long enough to see everyone, but maybe we can plan a group dinner or something, like the 29th or something? We can go out, or I can host something at my folks, if people don’t mind driving out to the Eastside.

Also in my worst moments of homesickness I’ve cursed every last one of you (though not individually) for not sending me a care package or northwest-y things. Where is my smoked salmon? Okay, admittedly this won’t really work because what I really want is food that can’t exactly be sent. But I would settle for smoked salmon and Dilletante chocolates.

I guess I’m homesick or whatever, but, man, what I really want right now is my mama’s corn bread.